1. Consider a confidential settlement agreement

You can insert clauses to keep the reason and terms of the divorce confidential. We are seeing more agreements in our practice such as this. One normally thinks of celebrities like Tom Cruise and Kate Holmes in 2012 as an example. But you don’t need to be a celebrity to have such a clause. This agreement would not normally be filed in the Family Court.  

 

2. Limit the use of social media

Don’t discuss your divorce on Facebook. Some period of time off social media altogether may be a good idea. You don’t need to get support from family and friends on social media. Whilst it is a good idea to have support, at this time it is probably best to do so face to face or on the phone. Encourage your family and friends also not to contact you on social media at this time.  

 

3. Suggest a private mediation

A private mediation may resolve things very quickly and cleanly. This will of course need the consent of your spouse. The advantage of such settlement with a mediator will reduce the time, cost and shut down gossip about your case. If you keep your case out of court with a private mediator, it will mean that fewer people know about your divorce as well.  

 

4. Agree the rules quickly

You need to agree with your spouse how the big issues will be resolved. Will our accountant value the business? Can we agree on a joint valuation of the house? Who is going to remain in the house, or is it going to be sold? Can we divide the chattels? In my experience the information gathering and discovery often takes a significant part of the case. You want to close these issues down quickly.  

 

Four reasons why you should keep your divorce settlement terms confidential 

  1. You may want to keep the reasons for your divorce private (e.g. Ashley Madison hack).
  2. You may want the amount you receive in your settlement to be private from everyone else.
  3. The children should not be subject to the gossip about the divorce.
  4. The fewer people that are involved, generally the better.

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